5 Steps to Getting Treated RIGHT!

People come and people go. They arrive into our lives, sometimes with a bang and sometimes quietly over time. They influence us, inspire us, irritate us and sometimes hurt us. They can be subtle, they can be blunt, they can be kind and they can be nasty, but whatever the shape or form they take, they most definitely impact how we act, how we feel, and how see ourselves.

As children we are dealt the family we get. Warts and all, we are dependent on them. Their personalities, values and beliefs influence ours as we grow up. Our families are our families for life.

Our friends however are a different story. Once we reach our teens, we are pretty much in control of choosing who we associate with and when. We begin to set boundaries around what is acceptable within the friendship and what is not. Hopefully this then carries into our adult friendships and relationships.

Why is it then that I so often hear stories from people about being bullied in the workplace, treated badly in relationships, being taken advantage of or mistreated by friends?

You teach people how to treat you!

Phil McGraw

If people are treating you badly, it’s because at some point in the relationship you have allowed them to believe that it is acceptable. You have neglected to speak up, stand up for yourself or be assertive about what’s ok and what is not. Yes, that can be difficult, depending on the circumstances, and scary too, but rest assured, somewhere along the way you have created this pattern yourself.

1. RESPECT YOURSELF and others will follow.

Don’t compromise when it comes to what you deserve. You deserve to be treated with kindness. You deserve to be supported and encouraged, and to experience trust and respect in your relationships.

2. SPEAK UP and say what you really feel.

No one can read your mind. If you don’t tell people when things upset or frustrate you, how will they ever know? It’s a lot healthier to have a difficult conversation than to bottle up resentment. Yes it’s confronting, but getting things out in the open is the healthiest way to communicate within a relationship.

3. BE HONEST, be clear and be ready to hear things from their side too.

Often miscommunication is responsible for hurt feelings, rather than malice. Listen and HEAR what the other person is saying and ask for the same in return. Untangle the wires and you might find things are OK after all.


Reflect on what YOU are putting into the relationship. Could it be that it is your attitude that is causing the problem? Are you bringing in the negative? Is the relationship two way or could you give more?


If you are in a relationship that you are not feeling comfortable about, and the above methods aren’t working, perhaps it’s time to move on. It’s ok to let people go, along the way. In fact it’s normally a sign that you are growing as a person and there’s room for someone new to inspire you and travel the next part of your journey with you.

Make a choice this year, to have the RIGHT people in your life!

In your day surround yourself with people who love you, motivate you, encourage you, and just make you feel good about being you.

Brigitte Nicole

Having difficulties with communication or forming the right relationships? Need some help?

Contact us today to find out about our Coaching programs.

Ph: 02 8011 8114 or 0418 490 422

Be Ultimate because Ordinary is Over-rated

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I have been with the same company for nearly 10 years. Although in a leadership role and successful, I felt burned out, stressed and unhappy at work. This was impacting my work /life balance as well as my interaction with others. I needed to re-evaluate my career priorities and level up my communication skills. Cheryl took the time to listen and understand my situation. We worked together to better understand my strengths and values and how important it is for them to be congruent with my career development. With Cheryl’s guidance I focused on the steps I needed to make to remain myself, whilst becoming a better leader at work. Cheryl’s style, attitude and easy to follow steps are pragmatic and realistic. She provided me with tools I could use every day to remain focused on changes I needed to make to achieve what I wanted.This is an ongoing journey but I am now more confident, have a deeper understanding of both myself and others, have the tools to perform better at work and am maintaining a more fulfilling work-life balance.

Catherine.R – National Manager

I met Cheryl as I started a personal journey in seeking greater clarity for my career. It has turned into much more and I am most grateful to her for helping me understand myself much better as well as how to interact with those around me. Both professional and private. Cheryl has been a source of strength and insight. Her warm and friendly nature makes it easy to relate to her. She challenges the status quo and help me improve many aspects of my life. A number of my colleagues have spent time with Cheryl and all feedback has been positive. I would highly recommend her.

Ross Cartwright, Managing Director – Head of Retail Aus/NZ, MFS INVESTMENTS

We were lucky enough to have Cheryl come to our Annual Team Conference where she presented a Creative Thinking Workshop for our Team. I would high recommend Cheryl and the workshop for anyone who is looking to open their minds and expand the vision of the business. The workshop was highly interactive with the concepts and ideas being able to be implemented relatively quickly and simply into our business.

Harry, Director of Projects, PLAN ASSIST PTY LTD

I have seen and worked with Cheryl on a number of events and projects she is a part of. So when it came to organising an EA/PA Networking event, I knew she was the right person to be our guest speaker. Cheryl is an engaging, humorous and energetic presenter, who can relate easily to a room of 10 to 100+ people. She brings a world of knowledge and experience to her presentations and her real-life business examples reinforce the messages she presents. Cheryl is definitely someone I would recommend to present at any corporate workshop.

A Edmonds, Events Manager, LUNAR PARK SYDNEY

I attended Be Ultimate’s workshop on Stress Management. It was amazing! It was exactly what I needed to understand how to manage my busy days. Cheryl taught us practical, easy to implement strategies that worked for me from day 1 and I haven't looked back since. I highly recommend Cheryl as a coach, and recommend her 2 hour workshops for anyone.


I have attended two LinkedIn workshops run by Be Ultimate and I have found them to be extremely informative, professional and succinct, whilst also being very personable and fun. I have already implemented new content and knowledge learned at the workshops ... starting at the actual workshops itself!

Thanks for your fun and informative workshop sessions.


Cheryl provides an incredible bouncing board to lead you through your journey of reinvention or simply to gain reinforcement that the path you’re on is the right one. Cheryl is an awesome person who truly cares for other people, wants to see them achieve their goals, isn’t backward in coming forwards when you need the prod in the right direction and will encourage you to see the great results you are accomplishing when they may not be as obvious to you.

I highly recommend Cheryl to anyone who is looking for business advice, a change in career or simply wants to gain some solutions to taking a positive approach to life.

A.Wilson, Business Owner, CATEGORACLE

Cheryl has facilitated a number of conferences for Liquid Learning in both Australia and New Zealand and has always been a pleasure to work with! Cheryl is helpful, punctual, reliable and always professional. She is very skilled in keeping the conference running to time and lifting the energy of the room as she facilitates Q&A sessions. Cheryl also frequently runs workshops with us and does regular speaking spots which she always receives great feedback for.

Jean Young, Project Executive, LIQUID LEARNING

With the majority of delegates rating Cheryl’s keynote presentation at the IOPO Conference 5 out of 5, she exceeded our expectations! Cheryl is truly passionate about helping businesses to succeed and thrive.

Linda, IOPO Advisory Board Member, IOPO

Cheryl has been a delight to work with over the past 7 years. She has assisted our business, Independent Garden Centres, with professional development workshops, she has been of great support to me as a coach. Cheryl has emceed the last two annual IGC Retail Conferences with an engaging and fun style, and she has been one of our conference keynote speakers who held the undivided attention of the delegates with ease. I thoroughly recommend Cheryl Alderman in any of these capacities.  Cheryl is a consummate professional who quickly builds rapport, she clearly enjoys sharing her knowledge with others, and there is always an element of fun which oft missing in many professionals.

Evan Mueller, CEO, IGC

In this workshop we were introduced to a range of simple strategies that the group could adopt to manage the inevitable stress and tension experienced in corporate and every life. The cynical group loved the practical and interactive approach of this workshop and were highly engaged throughout the 2 hours. The presenters brought in lots of great exercises. I am happy to recommend this Managing Stress workshop and both presenters to other corporate groups.

L Jones, People & Culture Business Partner, FOXTEL

Working with Cheryl has had benefits that have reached far beyond me as an individual. She has helped me to become a better leader and elevate the effectiveness and potential of my entire team. Cheryl's coaching has raised my self awareness, shifted my focus to control what I can control, and given me tools to realise opportunities that I wouldn't have thought possible before our first session.

Michael, Manager of Digital Marketing, DIMENSIONAL