ARE YOU ALWAYS THE STRONG ONE?

Are you the rock who everyone comes to with their issues? Workmates, friends, family…

Are you the person everyone counts on in a crisis? The solid reliable one…that everyone depends on to hold it all together and work out what to do? Is it you who organises things so that everyone is in the right place at the right time, projects are completed on time, disputes sorted out, finances dealt with?

If you have answered yes so far, then let me ask you this…

Have you noticed that if something is bothering you, you tend to just push it to the back of your mind and get on with life because you just don’t have the time, energy or inclination to deal with your own issues? Even if you did, is there anyone there that you can talk to or will understand what you are going through? Someone for you to offload to?

You may be suffering from ‘Strongman’ syndrome, and if so I would hazard a guess that you don’t have a shoulder to lean on for yourself. You are more than likely, your own shoulder, and just deal with life as it comes and get on with it. (Incidently this can also apply to women)

You are resilient, tough, solid.

It can be damn exhausting can’t it!

Carrying around all that responsibility for others every day, as well as your own issues (shoved into a dark cupboard at the back somewhere) is a heavy load to bear. Like any load that you continuously carry around, it gets heavier and heavier with time and eventually starts dragging you down. This can lead to resentment as you wonder “when is it my turn?” and “why do I always have to be the one to save the day?” Alternatively it can create stress, leading to irritability which often descends on the very people you are trying being strong for. In time the load can become so heavy it manifests in health issues like obesity, ulcers and high blood pressure.

Not fun.

As human beings we need an outlet, someone to offload to, bounce off or just share a good vent with. The problem is that if you are a ‘Strongman’ this is the least likely thing for you to do. Strongmen keep it in. Strongmen just cope with whatever is going on. Strongmen just get on with it.

The good news is that although in our parents’s day the “real man” image was set in stone, our generation is more evolved. We have a greater awareness of mental and emotional health issues. We know that repressing your emotions and denying your feelings is not a good thing. We know that there is a better way. We know that it is far healthier to process our thoughts and feelings, let them out, deal with them and then move on.

If you suspect you may be a Strongman and you don’t have someone to confide in or just talk to about stuff, like life, how you feel or what you are thinking, take a step, make a change today and do something for yourself. Find a mentor, a coach, or a good friend and just have a good long chat about everything. Let yourself process your own feelings, lighten that load you are carrying. It’s good for you. You will feel lighter, happier, and you will bear your responsibilites with a new vigour and enthusiasm.

You CAN be strong AND take care of YOU.

You deserve it!

If you need to reduce the stress and pressure, lighten your load and in the process discover how to live the life you REALLY want to live, we can help. Contact us at Be Ultimate to find out more about our Individual Coaching Programs. Sydney location, with Phone or Skype available for out of area. info@beultimate.com.au

Be Ultimate because Ordinary is Over-rated

What Our Clients Say

I have been with the same company for nearly 10 years. Although in a leadership role and successful, I felt burned out, stressed and unhappy at work. This was impacting my work /life balance as well as my interaction with others. I needed to re-evaluate my career priorities and level up my communication skills. Cheryl took the time to listen and understand my situation. We worked together to better understand my strengths and values and how important it is for them to be congruent with my career development. With Cheryl’s guidance I focused on the steps I needed to make to remain myself, whilst becoming a better leader at work. Cheryl’s style, attitude and easy to follow steps are pragmatic and realistic. She provided me with tools I could use every day to remain focused on changes I needed to make to achieve what I wanted.This is an ongoing journey but I am now more confident, have a deeper understanding of both myself and others, have the tools to perform better at work and am maintaining a more fulfilling work-life balance.

Catherine.R – National Manager

I met Cheryl as I started a personal journey in seeking greater clarity for my career. It has turned into much more and I am most grateful to her for helping me understand myself much better as well as how to interact with those around me. Both professional and private. Cheryl has been a source of strength and insight. Her warm and friendly nature makes it easy to relate to her. She challenges the status quo and help me improve many aspects of my life. A number of my colleagues have spent time with Cheryl and all feedback has been positive. I would highly recommend her.

Ross Cartwright, Managing Director – Head of Retail Aus/NZ, MFS INVESTMENTS

We were lucky enough to have Cheryl come to our Annual Team Conference where she presented a Creative Thinking Workshop for our Team. I would high recommend Cheryl and the workshop for anyone who is looking to open their minds and expand the vision of the business. The workshop was highly interactive with the concepts and ideas being able to be implemented relatively quickly and simply into our business.

Harry, Director of Projects, PLAN ASSIST PTY LTD

I have seen and worked with Cheryl on a number of events and projects she is a part of. So when it came to organising an EA/PA Networking event, I knew she was the right person to be our guest speaker. Cheryl is an engaging, humorous and energetic presenter, who can relate easily to a room of 10 to 100+ people. She brings a world of knowledge and experience to her presentations and her real-life business examples reinforce the messages she presents. Cheryl is definitely someone I would recommend to present at any corporate workshop.

A Edmonds, Events Manager, LUNAR PARK SYDNEY

I attended Be Ultimate’s workshop on Stress Management. It was amazing! It was exactly what I needed to understand how to manage my busy days. Cheryl taught us practical, easy to implement strategies that worked for me from day 1 and I haven't looked back since. I highly recommend Cheryl as a coach, and recommend her 2 hour workshops for anyone.

C Walt, CEO, NSD DESIGN & PRINT

I have attended two LinkedIn workshops run by Be Ultimate and I have found them to be extremely informative, professional and succinct, whilst also being very personable and fun. I have already implemented new content and knowledge learned at the workshops ... starting at the actual workshops itself!

Thanks for your fun and informative workshop sessions.

David, Accountant, McSWEENEY CA CONSULTING ACCOUNTANTS

Cheryl provides an incredible bouncing board to lead you through your journey of reinvention or simply to gain reinforcement that the path you’re on is the right one. Cheryl is an awesome person who truly cares for other people, wants to see them achieve their goals, isn’t backward in coming forwards when you need the prod in the right direction and will encourage you to see the great results you are accomplishing when they may not be as obvious to you.

I highly recommend Cheryl to anyone who is looking for business advice, a change in career or simply wants to gain some solutions to taking a positive approach to life.

A.Wilson, Business Owner, CATEGORACLE

Cheryl has facilitated a number of conferences for Liquid Learning in both Australia and New Zealand and has always been a pleasure to work with! Cheryl is helpful, punctual, reliable and always professional. She is very skilled in keeping the conference running to time and lifting the energy of the room as she facilitates Q&A sessions. Cheryl also frequently runs workshops with us and does regular speaking spots which she always receives great feedback for.

Jean Young, Project Executive, LIQUID LEARNING

With the majority of delegates rating Cheryl’s keynote presentation at the IOPO Conference 5 out of 5, she exceeded our expectations! Cheryl is truly passionate about helping businesses to succeed and thrive.

Linda, IOPO Advisory Board Member, IOPO

Cheryl has been a delight to work with over the past 7 years. She has assisted our business, Independent Garden Centres, with professional development workshops, she has been of great support to me as a coach. Cheryl has emceed the last two annual IGC Retail Conferences with an engaging and fun style, and she has been one of our conference keynote speakers who held the undivided attention of the delegates with ease. I thoroughly recommend Cheryl Alderman in any of these capacities.  Cheryl is a consummate professional who quickly builds rapport, she clearly enjoys sharing her knowledge with others, and there is always an element of fun which oft missing in many professionals.

Evan Mueller, CEO, IGC

In this workshop we were introduced to a range of simple strategies that the group could adopt to manage the inevitable stress and tension experienced in corporate and every life. The cynical group loved the practical and interactive approach of this workshop and were highly engaged throughout the 2 hours. The presenters brought in lots of great exercises. I am happy to recommend this Managing Stress workshop and both presenters to other corporate groups.

L Jones, People & Culture Business Partner, FOXTEL

Working with Cheryl has had benefits that have reached far beyond me as an individual. She has helped me to become a better leader and elevate the effectiveness and potential of my entire team. Cheryl's coaching has raised my self awareness, shifted my focus to control what I can control, and given me tools to realise opportunities that I wouldn't have thought possible before our first session.

Michael, Manager of Digital Marketing, DIMENSIONAL