SUPER HERO SYNDROME

quite often find myself in conversations with people who tell me that they don’t have enough time. They are constantly on the run and can’t seem to finish anything. They need more hours in their day because they just can’t keep on top of things. They are over-stretched, exhausted, fed up and wondering when the fun starts! Sound familiar?

As I ask a few questions and discover more about the details of their lives, I often discover a familiar pattern of behaviour. They do everything, and I mean EVERYTHING themselves.

Mothers, who although their children are well into their teens, are still doing all of the cooking, cleaning, tidying, organising, for them.

Business owners, who are still getting caught up in menial time-consuming tasks, hands-on with every little detail, when they should be focused on leading and growing their business.

Men, who are working crazy long hours all week, then spend their entire weekends working on the yard, the pool, the house, the car…

I could go on, but I’m sure you get the picture.

These people suffer from Super-Hero syndrome.

You will hear Super Heroes say things like “if you want a job done right…do it yourself.”

They would rather exhaust themselves finishing something today, than leave it until tomorrow. In the world of Super Heroes everything is urgent and important and no-one does things properly except for them.

The problem with Super Hero syndrome is that along the way you lose your value of self. By taking on responsibility for everything and everyone, you are forgetting to place a value on your own time. You are sacrificing your own quality of life to improve everyone else’s.

Over time, you will become exhausted and burnt out. You may even start to feel unappreciated and resentful, but you will still be trapped in the cycle of doing, doing, doing.

How can you break free of Super Hero syndrome?

Here are Six Easy Steps to help you take off the Super Hero cape and create a happy HUMAN balance in your life again:

1. SAY NO!

If someone asks you to do something that you don’t have time for, say NO!

Stop being a martyr.

2. DELEGATE

Amazingly, if you start handing tasks over to others, and give them the opportunity to do them more than once, with positive feedback and encouragement they actually become quite good at them. (Shocking, but true!) It’s a great feeling to teach or mentor someone and watch them achieve success. Yes, it takes more time to begin with, but eventually you will be free of that task and have time for something else!

3. DO NOT

complain, criticise or whine about the way others do a task, if their methods are not the same as the way you do things. They are not you. They don’t need to be you. They just need to reach the desired outcome. (I leave the room when my sons are cooking!)

4. SAY YES!

If someone offers to help…say YES please! Stop taking on everything yourself. People like to help out and contribute. You have been denying them that pleasure.

5. PRIORITISE

Everything is NOT urgent. Plan your day. Work out what really is a priority and what isn’t. Address things in the right order so you can leave the unimportant things until the next day or give them to others to take on.

6. TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF

If you are over tired and stressed you won’t be performing to your optimum level at any task. Make time for rest, relaxation and fun. A good half hour break will see you return refreshed, with a clearer head and ready to knock over that task twice as easily.

Most of all recognise and acknowledge that YOU are valuable, your time is valuable.

You need to value YOURSELF.

It’s ok to be human. We like you like that!

‘Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world.

Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.’

Rumi

Need some assistance breaking those Super Hero behaviour patterns? Contact Us today to find out more about our Coaching and Mentoring Packages. info@beultimate.com.au.

Be Ultimate because Ordinary is Over-rated

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I have been with the same company for nearly 10 years. Although in a leadership role and successful, I felt burned out, stressed and unhappy at work. This was impacting my work /life balance as well as my interaction with others. I needed to re-evaluate my career priorities and level up my communication skills. Cheryl took the time to listen and understand my situation. We worked together to better understand my strengths and values and how important it is for them to be congruent with my career development. With Cheryl’s guidance I focused on the steps I needed to make to remain myself, whilst becoming a better leader at work. Cheryl’s style, attitude and easy to follow steps are pragmatic and realistic. She provided me with tools I could use every day to remain focused on changes I needed to make to achieve what I wanted.This is an ongoing journey but I am now more confident, have a deeper understanding of both myself and others, have the tools to perform better at work and am maintaining a more fulfilling work-life balance.

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Ross Cartwright, Managing Director – Head of Retail Aus/NZ, MFS INVESTMENTS

We were lucky enough to have Cheryl come to our Annual Team Conference where she presented a Creative Thinking Workshop for our Team. I would high recommend Cheryl and the workshop for anyone who is looking to open their minds and expand the vision of the business. The workshop was highly interactive with the concepts and ideas being able to be implemented relatively quickly and simply into our business.

Harry, Director of Projects, PLAN ASSIST PTY LTD

I have seen and worked with Cheryl on a number of events and projects she is a part of. So when it came to organising an EA/PA Networking event, I knew she was the right person to be our guest speaker. Cheryl is an engaging, humorous and energetic presenter, who can relate easily to a room of 10 to 100+ people. She brings a world of knowledge and experience to her presentations and her real-life business examples reinforce the messages she presents. Cheryl is definitely someone I would recommend to present at any corporate workshop.

A Edmonds, Events Manager, LUNAR PARK SYDNEY

I attended Be Ultimate’s workshop on Stress Management. It was amazing! It was exactly what I needed to understand how to manage my busy days. Cheryl taught us practical, easy to implement strategies that worked for me from day 1 and I haven't looked back since. I highly recommend Cheryl as a coach, and recommend her 2 hour workshops for anyone.

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Thanks for your fun and informative workshop sessions.

David, Accountant, McSWEENEY CA CONSULTING ACCOUNTANTS

Cheryl provides an incredible bouncing board to lead you through your journey of reinvention or simply to gain reinforcement that the path you’re on is the right one. Cheryl is an awesome person who truly cares for other people, wants to see them achieve their goals, isn’t backward in coming forwards when you need the prod in the right direction and will encourage you to see the great results you are accomplishing when they may not be as obvious to you.

I highly recommend Cheryl to anyone who is looking for business advice, a change in career or simply wants to gain some solutions to taking a positive approach to life.

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Cheryl has facilitated a number of conferences for Liquid Learning in both Australia and New Zealand and has always been a pleasure to work with! Cheryl is helpful, punctual, reliable and always professional. She is very skilled in keeping the conference running to time and lifting the energy of the room as she facilitates Q&A sessions. Cheryl also frequently runs workshops with us and does regular speaking spots which she always receives great feedback for.

Jean Young, Project Executive, LIQUID LEARNING

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Linda, IOPO Advisory Board Member, IOPO

Cheryl has been a delight to work with over the past 7 years. She has assisted our business, Independent Garden Centres, with professional development workshops, she has been of great support to me as a coach. Cheryl has emceed the last two annual IGC Retail Conferences with an engaging and fun style, and she has been one of our conference keynote speakers who held the undivided attention of the delegates with ease. I thoroughly recommend Cheryl Alderman in any of these capacities.  Cheryl is a consummate professional who quickly builds rapport, she clearly enjoys sharing her knowledge with others, and there is always an element of fun which oft missing in many professionals.

Evan Mueller, CEO, IGC

In this workshop we were introduced to a range of simple strategies that the group could adopt to manage the inevitable stress and tension experienced in corporate and every life. The cynical group loved the practical and interactive approach of this workshop and were highly engaged throughout the 2 hours. The presenters brought in lots of great exercises. I am happy to recommend this Managing Stress workshop and both presenters to other corporate groups.

L Jones, People & Culture Business Partner, FOXTEL

Working with Cheryl has had benefits that have reached far beyond me as an individual. She has helped me to become a better leader and elevate the effectiveness and potential of my entire team. Cheryl's coaching has raised my self awareness, shifted my focus to control what I can control, and given me tools to realise opportunities that I wouldn't have thought possible before our first session.

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